Choose Your Adventure!


The Neurotic Monkey's Guide to Survival is dedicated to providing innovative ideas that will alter reality as we know it and could very well SAVE YOUR LIFE. Plus videos of people getting hit in the junk.



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    Mass Distraction

    Monkey See...


    Deep Red

    Monkey See (on TV)...

    Childrens Hospital - On Adult Swim


    Goonies the Musical!


    Sloth's Song

    Goonies the Musical!


    Takin' It Back

    Goonies the Musical!


    Piano Lessons

    Goonies the Musical!





    Gideon Defoe's awesome Pirates! In an Adventure with... book series is being adapted to screen by Aardman (Wallace & Gromit, Shaun the Sheep, Creature Comforts, Chicken Run, etc.). Here's the brand new trailer:

    For more information, check out the IMDB page.

    Quotent Quotables - July 19, 2011

    Be less curious about people and more curious about ideas.

    - Marie Curie

    "I and Love and You" by The Avett Bros

    The Avett Brothers - "I and Love and You"

    I know this song sounds like something from a shitty moment of realization scene in Gray's Anatomy....but I don't care. I love this song. It's just something that...soothes me. It's a song that would fit greeting sunrise as it peaks over a hill as you drive off into the distance, or watching the one you love peacefully dozing, or enjoy a cigarette while noticing the stars for the first time in a long time. It's a good song for reminiscing about fireflies, or picturing what your first house will look like, or saying goodbye to friends that you know the next time you see them, things will be different. You'll be different. So yeah, I like this song.

    Verbiage - July 19, 2011

    Today's word of the day is "Ardent:"




    1. having, expressive of, or characterized by intense feeling; passionate; fervent: an ardent vow; ardent love.
    2. intensely devoted, eager, or enthusiastic; zealous: an ardent theatergoer. an ardent student of french history.
    3. vehement; fierce: They were frightened by his ardent, burning eyes.
    4. burning, fiery, or hot: the ardent core of a star.

    "Silly Princess..."

    "...Coins are for Plumbers."

    Today's shirt from Teefury. One day only - go here to buy it before July 20th comes around!

    You Gotta Make Your Own Fun

    Even if you're a Dark Lord of the Sith...


    Zelda Convention - July 18, 2011

    Looking back on it, maybe I should've said "pussy."

    Click to read more ...

    Quotent Quotables - July 18, 2011

    The first duty of a revolutionist is to get away with it. The second duty is to eat breakfast. I ain't going.

    - Abbie Hoffman (stated right before he was arrested)

    Moviegoers are a Cowardly & Superstitious Lot

    This is everywhere - but here's another place to find The Dark Knight Rises trailer.


    It's 80% old footage, 10% titles/images, and 10% new footage.

    Also, the more I think about it, the more I realize that the title is dumb. It goes Batman Begins then Dark Knight...then Dark Knight Rises? Why not have something other than "Dark Knight" in the title so the series doesn't have two DK titles leaving Batman Begins sticking out like a sore thumb?

    The second one should've been The Dark Knight Rises and then this one could've been The _____ Falls, or _____'s End or something, especially as the teaser/trailer bills it as the conclusion of Nolan's trilogy (and we know WB is relaunching in about 2 years or so).

    Grumble mumble.

    (Via Comicsalliance)

    Trekkie vs. Star Wars Geek

    Fisticuffs is when you tell me who would win in a knockdown, dragout, physical fight to the death between two people or groups.


    The sci-fi nerd will is torn asunder! Who will win in this eternal struggle twixt utopian retrofuture and futuristic ancient history? Remember - it's the fanbases that are at war, not any of the characters from the properties.

    Click to read more ...

    I'mma Take a Crap on the Balanced Budget Amendment

    This week in the continuing saga of the debt ceiling, the House will be voting on a Republican proposal to make raising the debt ceiling contingent on the passage of a balanced budget amendment to the Constitution. This measure is expected to pass the House where it will be dead on arrival in the Senate. That’s a good thing because, although a balanced budget amendment is a good talking point, it’s horrible policy - particularly the specific one under consideration.

    Click to read more ...

    Week of July 18, 2011

    Every week, we list our recommendations of new music, books, comics, movies and TV to check out. This is Recs in Effect:

    New Book

    Supergods: What Masked Vigilantes, Miraculous Mutants, and a Sun God from Smallville Can Teach Us About Being Human by Grant Morrison

    Grant Morrison is the man of theory that people like to put up when defending comics. A man interested in investigating, deconstructing, destroying, reinventing and adhering to the fundemental aspects of storytelling and comic books, Morrison can be the Tarantino of comics when he works. He can also be the Spike Lee, an artist with so much to say that he tries to say it all at once, creating whiplash inducing tonal shifts that make it easy to lose focus. In either case, Morrison appears to approach comics as a medium in a very solemn way, respecting all that has come before him, while trying to just finding the constant vein of having fun and creating the impossible that he relishes so. A book by him on the medium, including meditations on Superman and X-Men, the two franchises that he completely rejuvenated, is a must grab for anyone that is interested in media studies, literary theory and where Batman gets those wonderful toys.

    Click to read more ...

    Verbiage - July 18, 2011

    Today's word of the day is Reckless:


    1. utterly unconcerned about the consequences of some action; without caution; careless (usually followed by of ): to be reckless of danger. 
    2. characterized by or proceeding from such carelessness: reckless extravagance.

    We're Gonna Need a Bigger Beat